To maintain our tax-exempt status, and allow you to make tax-deductible donations, we have to organise an annual general meeting, so our 61st People's Congress is scheduled for this Friday night at 7pm.
Some might ask that because democracy, as practised with the the "one-person, one vote" method is flawed, should we even bother with attending and the pretence of voting? The answer is yes, due to DBSC improvements made to the historical "all people are equal" model.
Put simply we are considering weighting different people's votes differently. Here is the summary:
- 100 votes for Dear Leader, The People's Prince and anyone else who has been Commodore for more than 4 years.
- 100 votes for The Wise Master, with another bonus 150 votes if Madam Wise Master agrees.
- 50 votes for Life Members
- 1 vote for every toastie made by the Canteen Captain up to a limit of 1,000 votes.
- 10 votes for each Sunday volunteered in the Canteen by the Canteen Crew .
- 5 votes for anyone who has sweep the floor of the clubhouse or picked up other people's rubbish or done any other volunteering unprompted.
- Pi votes (rounded to 3.142) for any STEM student or graduate.
- 2 votes for any millennial without a tattoo.
- 1 vote for any financial member.
- 7 votes for 4.7 sailors, to be voted as a block, because they seem to do everything together
As you can see from the fully researched vote weightings we have overcome the historical problems of past voter eligibility criteria (i.e. property ownership, having testes, or just being a human being).
Alternatively, come along on Friday and vote old school. One vote, per member, perhaps.
There will be free beverage and food opportunities after the presentation and the short formal meeting.